Going Up the Down Escalator

The other night on Pesach I heard wonderful and inspirational words of Torah from Rabbi Silver. He spoke about prayer and growing as a Jew. He has always been religious, but he spoke about slightly envying those who come to religion as adults and have to work hard to change their lives. Rabbi Silver used the classic example of trying to go up a down escalator. If you stand still, you'll simply go down. And if you walk you'll only stay in the same place. But if you run, you'll eventually reach the top. It may be more difficult, but that's part of what makes the accomplishment more satisfying.

This morning I realized that idea is what is happening to me right now with my weight loss goals. But I'm not reaching anything. I'm running and running and running (literally) but I'm no closer than when I began. I can talk about strength and endurance and inches lost all I want, but my actual declared goal is weight loss. Is my version of "running" really "walking"? Is my body that resistant?

Pesach is amazing and awe-inspiring...but it's also a holiday that can make you feel like you're pregnant with a big bloated matzoh baby! And just like after having a real baby, after Pesach it can take a while to de-swell. However, in the meantime, I feel so discouraged.

Sometimes when you feel discouraged, it helps to change things up a bit so you can feel like you're trying something new. So even though at Max10 I get the hardest workout imaginable, and even though I absolutely love to kick-box, at the end of this session I'm switching to something new that takes more endurance: running. I'll definitely keep my gloves and buy a pair of focus mitts, so I can continue to train. Maybe I'll even exchange lessons with my husband. I'll teach him to kick-box and he'll teach me Krav Maga.

I'll be keeping my babysitter and every morning running the 2.4 mile Seward Park Loop, plus the walk there and back, which will be a total of 3.8 miles. The whole walk back is uphill. My MP3 player will need some more "let's move it" songs. Recommendations?

If THIS doesn't whip my behind into shape, I don't know what will!

You Are Not Alone...

I thought I was the only one in my Max10 classes who wasn't seeing weight loss. The inches melt off but the weight stays within a 3-pound range. I've dropped a few skirt sizes and I'm stronger, faster, fitter, leaner, and way more energetic! Today I overheard Tommy, who works out in our class and has noticeably trimmed down since he started 4 months ago, talking about how he hasn't lost a single pound, but he has lost 3 inches off his waist. So I'm not alone! And neither is anyone else out there who struggles with the number on the scale but still sees positive results in the mirror.

But I'm worried...next week Pesach begins! If anyone's been to my parents' house for a Pesach meal, they'd know about Chef Thierry Adam and his delightful dishes covered in gravies, sauces, and/or creams that make you forget you're not eating chametz!

When I was pregnant, I would ask Chef Thierry to please only give me the side dishes and leave off the chicken or meat because I was feeling nauseous. This year, however, I am not pregnant and certainly not nauseous. I'll be requesting my meals without the gravies, sauces, and/or creams this year.

This, plus not being able to work out until Thursday...good luck to us all!

Letting It Sink In

As I went though the local drive-thru Starbucks today, I remembered my reaction when I saw the sign that it was going to be built right in my neighborhood. I'd thrown my hands in the air and cheered! I love coffee. I really do. But then I realized something. I'd cheered for a drive-thru Starbucks? Like it was worth celebrating? But every time my husband says "I love you" or "You look beautiful," I don't throw my hands in the air and cheer with joy. Instead I let it sink in, warming me through and through, filling my heart so that I can truly know he loves me and believe he thinks I'm beautiful.

This is important, I think. Letting it sink in. I'm writing about it on my weight-loss blog for a reason. It's hard to believe your husband when he tells you that you look great, because you know his goal is to make you happy and he'll say anything to accomplish that goal. My husband reminded me of something, though. He wouldn't let me wear something in public if he thought it made me look fat. So when I ask him, "How do I look?" and he says, "Beautiful," he's probably telling the truth.

And once I accepted this, I let that sink in. When I dropped two dress sizes in the last 4 months and he told me my body was noticeably changing and he was happy to really see my waist more defined, I believed him, and it motivated me to work even harder.

I don't ever believe the compliments I receive. I always think they're motivated by something. Nothing malicious, of course. I simply wonder if my trainer at the gym thinks I need a confidence boost, if my husband is trying to make me feel good, or if my children are trying to get a treat. It's time to stop wondering! It's time to say thanks, believe it, and let it all sink in.

A Love Story

Let me introduce you all to my new favorite friend: Chobani!

They're new ad campaign is called "A Love Story" for a reason...I'm in love! It really does induce the same experience of mmmmm as a decadent piece of chocolate cake. Nonfat Chobani is a Greek yogurt with an amazing 14 grams of protein in each serving! My personal favorite is the pomegranate fruit-on-the-bottom, which has actual pom seeds in it. For anyone who's ever had a cup of Red Mango frozen yogurt, it's like eating that for breakfast...and the occasional afternoon snack. Professional skinny girl Bethenny Frankel eats Greek yogurt for breakfast, with a great video instructional on putting together a healthy breakfast.

I've always eaten a cup of nonfat yogurt before working out, but Chobani has so much protein and is so delicious that it really gives me more endurance for exercise. Especially yesterday, when I was the last one to show up at MKG and I was the 9th person, making the pairs uneven. And Nicole, the toughest instructor at Max10, had me do every exercise twice to even things out. I know it was tough, but it was soooo worth it. I should be the last person to show up every day!

As for the rest of my meals, I would, of course, rather eat a balanced amount of non-fat healthy protein-filled foods than eat small amounts of pointless nutrition-free foods. But I'm having a hard time including whole grains, since carbs and starches of any kind are my weakness. They're my gateway drug to bagels and pasta, and it's going to take some time before I'm comfortable including them in my daily diet without feeling tempted to boil up a pot of spaghetti and drown it in cheese. So don't push me to start steaming up some brown rice! I'll get there eventually.

So far, today, I've been great. I'm using the Biggest Loser model as much as I can. Today for breakfast was nonfat Chobani with raspberries. After a tough work out, my snack was a serving of raisins. I should have including protein but I was jumping in the shower and had to get back to the baby. But I more than made up for it with lunch by doubling up on the scrambled egg beaters, mixing in chopped veggies and a dash of hot sauce. And my afternoon snack: plain coffee and a nonfat Chobani with blueberries. My plan for dinner is halibut  and brussel sprouts. I'm looking for seasoning suggestions for the halibut. Thank you Dad for catching it, freezing it, and giving me some...but I'm on my last package, so you'd better get back to fishing! And on the Biggest Loser model, I'm not allowed to eat anything else at all for the rest of the day except for dinner. My favorite way to stave off hunger caused by my simple love of food is to drink tea. Sometimes we think we're hungry when we're really just thirsty, and drinking water or tea satiates us. Also, warm beverages aid in digestion and help us feel fuller faster, so drinking tea or plain coffee immediately after a meal is a great idea. If you're drinking caffeinated tea, that's an added bonus to weight loss. So wish me luck for the rest of the day, people! And don't forget I'm looking for healthy halibut recipes!

Biggest Loser Daily Diet:

Breakfast: 1/2 serving protein, 1 serving whole grain, 1 serving fruit

Snack: 1/2 protein, 1 fruit

Lunch: 1 protein, 1/2 whole grain, 1 vegetable

Snack: 1/2 protein, 1 fruit

Dinner: 1/2 protein, 1/2 whole grain, 2 vegetables

Frustrated!

The title says it all: Frustrated! My inches continue to go down, but my weight stays the same. My skirts fit better, but my weight stays the same. Grrrr. I know I should be happier about the inches than the weight, but the number on the scale means something to me. Because once that number starts going down, that's when the real inches will melt off like a witch with a water allergy!

Every single day I work my tushy off at Max10, but the pounds only come off when I eat like a bird. The strength training and constant cardio have to be doing something, though! I definitely feel stronger, faster, and I have way more endurance. My kick-boxing form is much more centered and smooth, and my left cross is becoming as powerful as my right. I have more energy and enthusiasm when I'm playing with my kids. I'm more likely to sit on the floor with the baby than I was when my muscles were still weak from 9 long months of heavy pregnancy that ironically threatened to force me to the ground via gravity.

My theory is that my body is building up the strength to lose the massive amount of weight. My muscles are aware of my intentions and are gearing up for a big win (or loss...get it?).

Another challenge faces me: BASAR FEST 2011! I coordinate this annual festival of meat, including a barbecue and a cook-off...so wish me luck. Obviously you should all come and support the cause...but even more so, you should all come and police my eating!

Ow, I'm Short.

I am very sore...and bruised.

Today at MAX10, there was an incongruous proportion of tall and short people. When everyone had been paired off by height, the tallest and the shortest (me, of course) were left. I desperately looked at my instructor Manolito to switch us around. I couldn't imagine how I would hold focus mitts for a women who was at least a foot taller than me! But Manolito told me it would make my work-out more intense, so I gave it my best shot. By the end of the first round of crosses and hooks, my shoulders were burning from holding my hands at my partner's head level. I'm just over 4 feet 10 inches, by the way. It was like partnering a full-grown adult with a child.

Then came side-kicks to the ribs, and I held the pads as high as I could. My forearms burned. To make it worse, my partner kept kicking me in the elbow instead of kicking the pads. Really? I mean, really?! "Ow," I said over and over. But she kept kicking, determined to make my teeth rattle. Finally I just broke down and told her, "Really, you're genuinely hurting me during a practice drill." In my head I told myself this better be worth it. I haven't lost an ounce since last week and now I'm bruised and burning.

I guess I'll have to wait and see. This week has been a tough week at MAX10 at MKG Seattle. Yesterday was Slade's first day instructing...and yes, his name is really Slade. Slade likes to mix up the cardio with the strength training. Alternating burpees, jumping rope, and lifting weights was how we started the class...and that was just the warm-up. Tomorrow is Mary's day, and Mary is super-tough. This new combination of extreme training should reap great results!!!

In the meantime, however, Purim is this weekend and our house will be filled with candy and treats. I'm definitely going to be using what I've named the Chicken Breast Technique.

In the meantime, my Public Accountability concept has been working. My friends call me out when they see me picking the wrong food. Their excuse is that I asked them to do it...here...on my blog. I wonder what else I can ask everyone to do for me to help me lose weight?

Out Of My Head

Ever since I announced my weight, I've felt very free. It's out of my head now, and I'm not thinking about it as much. Let other people think about it. Now I'm thinking about changing it instead.  Though my blog has only 9 official followers so far, way more than 9 people have approached me since last week to comment on my weight announcement.

"How's your public accountability going? I want to lose weight, too."

"My husband asked me if I weigh more or less than you." (that one made me giggle)

"It was brave of you to put your weight out there."

Well, to all who have said something: Thank you! I feel like I'm opening up the conversation about weight loss and showing that your personal struggle can have group support, even if you don't attend Weight Watchers meetings or Food Addicts support groups.

Brussel Sprouts and Zucchini

My sister Francine made me taste a brussel sprout last year. I was dubious. Hesitantly, I stabbed one with a fork and took a bite and was pleased to discover it was delicious! A little ground black pepper and cayenne and pop them in the oven until they're soft enough to eat. And the other day she showed me that there's more to snacking on zucchini than just steaming it in the microwave. A dab of sriracha and marinara sauce on each slice of zucchini and once again pop them in the oven until they're soft enough to eat. Healthy AND addictive.

Tomorrow is the first day of a new 10-week session of kickboxing at MKG. The owner is adding Sunday classes because I'm not the only one who can't come to the Saturday class. In other good news, I just ate some baked chicken breast to avoid eating any biscocho cookies, which I believe are dairy. (But if they're not dairy, don't tell me!) I also get weighed tomorrow, so wish me luck!

Learn. Play. Sweat. Chocolate Lollipops?

I've been asked what my exact diet plan and work-out plan is. But when you've got 3 kids and a job with no defined hours, it's difficult to plot out each day in advance. So instead of laying out a list of foods I'll eat each day or a schedule for extra work-outs, I have to play it by ear.

The motto of MKG's 10-week kickboxing and body sculpting session is: Learn. Play. Sweat. And there's a sign on the front that says: Leave your ego at the door. I've decided to apply those ideas to my daily choices as a way to stick with my plan.

Learn: Last night I made chocolate lollipops. Growing up, my mother would always set up the kitchen for my sisters and I to paint lollipop molds with colored melted chocolate. Paintbrushes in hand, we set about our delicious artwork. After they hardened and were filled with melted Nestle Crunch and a lollipop stick, we would wait for them to come out of the freezer so we could pop them out of the molds and dig in! Of course the lollipops were for our Mishloach Manot baskets, which are gifts of food given to family and friends on the Jewish holiday of Purim. I've decided to make them this year. The theme is Star Wars, so Yoda, Darth Vader, and Chewbacca molds have been filled with green, black, and brown chocolate, and of course Nestle Crunch. And as I stared this morning at the delicious hardened chocolate lollipops sitting in my fridge, I decided it was time to LEARN from my past mistakes and JUST SAY NO!

You see, I've realized that I'm most likely a food addict. I think about food all the time. If it's nearby, I always want to eat it. And I regret it afterward, even if all I ate was a salad. But knowledge is power, and knowing is half the battle. Now, before I eat anything, I put real thought into the choice. Am I eating this because I'm a food addict, because I'm genuinely hungry, or because I'm bored?

Play: I've chosen kickboxing because it's fun! I love all the punching and kicking. It's a great way to feel powerful and strong. Exercise gives you endorphins, endorphins make you happy...and happy people just don't eat their feelings in ice cream. So the lesson is to choose an exercise you enjoy. If it's fun, the time will fly. I absolutely never look at the clock when I'm at MKG because I'm having such a great time. I don't love the treadmill or running around the Loop. But my MP3 player has great music on it, and Broadway show soundtracks make anything fun!

Sweat: Because if you're not sweating, you're not working hard enough. Feel proud of the sweat. If your face isn't dripping, then step up your game. I have to tell myself that I'm stronger than I think I am. Today in class we had to count how many push-ups we could do in a minute. Military style, elbows under the shoulders, all the way to the floor...no girl-style push-ups allowed. I normally wuss out at 18 because my wrists start to hurt. Sounds pathetic, I know. Not today. Today I reminded myself that I'm strong, and that by being strong, I only get stronger, and I knocked out 30.


I'm definitely leaving my ego at the door from now on...it only makes me stronger.

The Plan

It's simple: diet and exercise. Crazy, right? I won't be using any pills, supplements, or plastic surgery...at least not yet.

The Diet: Fiber and protein are my best friends. Rudi's Organic Double Fiber Bread is a great source of fiber and protein without feeling guilty for eating bread. With 6 grams of protein and only 1 gram of fat and 90 calories per slice, this bread is not only healthy, kosher, and organic, it's also delicious! Another important diet plan is to cut out all dairy and pasta, and try to stay away from processed foods.

Keeping kosher means there's a great trick to keep me away from dairy. I keep chicken breast in the fridge and when I'm feeling the intense desire to down a bowl of mac n' cheese, I take a bite of chicken. You see, when you keep kosher, you can't mix meat and dairy. But you also have to wait a certain number of hours after eating meat before you can eat dairy. I think I'll reserve dairy for my non-fat breakfast yogurt. This is going to be tough, by the way, because I LOVE CHEESE! It really is a delight.

The Exercise: I've been attending a kickboxing class in Northgate at a gym called MKG Seattle. They offer 10-week intense group training sessions. The classes are 4 days a week plus a bonus class on Saturday that I can't attend because I keep Shabbat. They are an hour long and by the end of each class you should be dripping with sweat. Two days a week you learn how to kickbox and do tons of cardio. And two days a week is strength training mixed with cardio. It's amazing and the trainers are excited to be there. Even though it's a group class, it feels like you're getting a personal training session. I recently started at 163 and managed to get down to 157 in 7 weeks of the class. 6 pounds may not sound like a lot, but it was definitely a struggle for me. However, I've lost two inches off my waist, another two off my hips, and another two off my thighs. My arms, though, got bigger! I guess all that boxing builds up some pretty big muscles.

I'm going to have to add more exercise to my routine to double my weight-loss. If I can lose 6 pounds in 7 weeks of kickboxing without being serious about my diet, then my new short-term goal (as part of my 40-pound long-term goal) is to lose 12 pounds in the next 7 weeks and get down to 145 pounds. That's 12 pounds by April 26th! Treadmill, old friend, you will be following my kickboxing class on rainy days. Seward Park Loop, your two-and-a-half mile run will be perfect for sunny days, especially if I add extra miles by walking there and back.

Looking forward to my first self-imposed weigh-in next Monday!

Public Accountability

On MTV's I Used To Be Fat, recent high school graduates who are overweight spend the summer working out so that when they start college in the Fall, they will be able to say with confidence, "I used to be fat!" These teens lose anywhere from 50 to 90 pounds in one summer! And on The Biggest Loser, contestants ranging from just-past-chubby to the morbidly obese lose weight by working out constantly and competing in physical challenges. Unlike Double Dare, nobody's reaching up an enormous nose or sliding on green slime. But like the kids' show that made Marc Summers a household name, the contestants are, in fact, smiling. Why are they smiling? Because they have internalized the concept that pain is fat leaving the body.

The phenomenon of losing weight in the public eye has opened up a new concept for me in my attempt at finally losing the baby weight...public accountability. And since I won't be on a reality weight-loss show anytime soon because I'm simply not large enough to apply, I'll be using the internet to keep myself accountable!

Of course I also have to consider the other concept...public embarrassment. I'm announcing my weight loss goals to everyone. Think about it. An ex-boyfriend could be reading this right now, or a girl who hated me in high school. But the truth is I was always on the ever-so-slightly-chubby side, only now it's plainly obvious and I'm sick and tired of it. It's more embarrassing to be chubby than it is to announce it and lose the weight. So believe it or not (and I'd rather you not believe it), I currently weigh 157 pounds.

Feeling good at my sister-in-law's wedding.

Quick background: I live in Seattle, I just turned 30, I have 3 kids (3 c-sections), and I'm married to a man who can lose 10 pounds simply by cutting out soda pop for a few weeks. I'm an Orthodox Jew, which means there's a lot of food all of the time. Every weekend and holiday is filled with food.

I had considered making my weight loss goal 30 pounds, but why not really go for it and commit to my ultimate goal of taking off 40 pounds! So here goes...

My weight loss goal: 40 pounds.